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funny freemason rumors

Ashlar

Registered User
My brother is an on-again/off-again conspiracy theorist . Right after he watched the movie National Treasure he called me and asked if I knew about the treasure . Which I laughed and answered "No , it is only a plot device in a movie." . He still doesn't believe me .
 

Michael Hatley

Premium Member
They all make me laugh, except the Shriner one. Man, people can be so ugly. It speaks volumes about people when they trust that sort of thing more than their own eyes.
 

Benton

Premium Member
My brother is an on-again/off-again conspiracy theorist . Right after he watched the movie National Treasure he called me and asked if I knew about the treasure . Which I laughed and answered "No , it is only a plot device in a movie." . He still doesn't believe me .


When I was student teaching in college, one of my cooperating teachers saw my ring and asked me if there was a National Treasure or something like it. I just laughed and said, "If there was, do you think I'd be here doing this?" :p
 

Eric Edwards

Registered User
I heard that when your initiated you have to kiss the backside of baphomet which is a bloody goat head... and if you walk around the backside you end up not having to kiss it's rear...
there will be a woman who will orally satisfy you.

I went and got a petition right away....JUST KIDDING.
 

Spring TX MM

Premium Member
Most of these are funny as heck. I was instructing one of the best EAs I've ever taught. He asked me what to say when people question him about Freemasonry. I told him the usual and said if he ever didn't know what to say, to just call me. He called me one evening from a social gathering with friends and asked how to respond since he had been asked if we burn crosses and wear white sheets. I told him to say yes and to add that we dance naked under the moon, continuously take over the world and not forgetting, eat babies for breakfast. He laughed a little and agreed to say what I told him. The next time we met for instruction, he said it was the perfect thing to say. They all laughed and realized how silly their questions were.

S&F
Kyle
Spring Lodge #1174
 

lbrown2

Registered User
The rumors I've heard was that we're devil worshippers, and during the EA initiation, the candidates have to be completely naked and sleep in a casket. If you're in the Scottish Rite and you obtain the 33rd degree, you have to drink blood from a skull. And that freemasonry is a religion and we're of course a part of the Illuminati!
 

knightnblue

Registered User
tomasball said:
We entirely plan to rule the world. Right after we figure out how to rule the 800 or so lodges in the Grand Lodge of Texas.

Hahahahaha!!! Good one!

Rick Flores MM Eagle Pass #626
 

knightnblue

Registered User
SeeKer.mm said:
I got to eat the goat with a nice curry sauce when I was done with him... :beer2:

I prefer the goat cooked on a spit with lemon-pepper :)

Rick Flores MM Eagle Pass #626
 

Plustax

Registered User
Our Lodge is next door to a Vet clinic which ALWAYS has goats outside in the pen area. Some of us usually ask the new candidate if he hasn't picked out a goat yet to go outside & choose one real quick before we get started! LOL Hey.... It's almost a rite of passage!
Kinda like going from Polywog to Shellback! Ha My dad went thru that on his way to Makin Islands during WWII & he wasn't even a squid!
 

martin

Registered User
take over the world, and i say oh yes we trying to do that for the last 400 years we r almost there
 

JTM

"Just in case"
Premium Member
we're all porch masons, in that we haven't been let in on the real secrets, yet!
 

phulseapple

Premium Member
Pretty much anything by A.Ralph Epperson and Jim Marrs have been the funniest I have heard. Outdone only by the one and only David Icke who thinks we are Reptilian shape shifters. I have also been inundated with claims that we are strictly an evil Jewish cult responsible for the 9/11 attacks...
 

martin

Registered User
Oh ya I was driving to down town Toronto , in the hwy 404 with couple masons friends and of course I have a mason sticker in the back of my car , so a car pass me and as they passing me I saw a bunch on nuns in the other car and they look at us and made the sign of the cross
 

Virgin Islands Brother

Registered User
A brother told me a coworker was interested in joining. He went through the usual steps to bring in an initiate then tried to inform him. He then noticed that the guy was avoiding him. Two weeks of this and he finally cornered the guy. He asked him what's wrong. The guy tells him he can't do it again. No disrespect but he's heterosexual. Needless to say the brother was floored.
 
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