The Masonic Lodge Structure

Discussion in 'Masonic Jocularity and Merriment' started by david918, May 26, 2010.

  1. david918

    david918 Premium Member

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    The Masonic Lodge Structure

    WORSHIPFUL MASTER

    Leaps tall buildings in a single bound

    Is more powerful than an Intercity Express

    Is faster than a speeding bullet

    Walks on Water

    Gives policy to God

    SENIOR WARDEN

    Leaps short buildings with a single bound

    Is more powerful than a goods train

    Is just as fast as a speeding bullet

    Walks on the water if the sea is calm

    Talks with God

    JUNIOR WARDEN

    Leaps short buildings with a running start and a favorable wind

    Is almost as powerful as a goods train

    Is faster than a speeding airgun pellet

    Walks on water of a swimming pool

    Talks with God if special dispensation is given

    SENIOR DEACON

    Barely clears a garden hut

    Loses a tug-of-war with a train

    Can fire a speeding bullet

    Swims well

    Is occasionally addressed by God

    JUNIOR DEACON

    Makes high marks on the wall when trying to leap buildings

    Is run over by trains

    Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury

    Doggie paddles

    Talks with the animals

    SENIOR STEWARD

    Runs into buildings

    Recognizes trains two out of three times

    Is not issued ammunition

    Can stay afloat with a life vest

    Talks to walls

    JUNIOR STEWARD

    Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter buildings

    Says "Look at the choo choo's"

    Wets himself with a water pistol

    Plays in mud puddles

    Mumbles to himself

    SECRETARY

    Lifts buildings and walks under them

    Kicks trains off the track

    Catches speeding bullets in his mouth and eats them

    Freezes water with a single glance
     
  2. Huw

    Huw Guest

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    Having noticed the sad mess going on in "certain other places", a cynic might add:

    GRAND MASTER

    Demolishes fine old structures with a single edict.

    Is more powerful than a Grand Lodge.

    Is faster than a speeding lawsuit.

    Walks on Brethren.

    Thinks he is God.

    (I'm real glad I don't have that sort of GM, and that you don't either!)

    T & F,

    Huw
     

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