I'm sorry to hear about this experience. Coachn said it right, finish the progression and find a Lodge that fits; maybe after progression you find that you fit in. Sometimes it can take time, but only you can decide this.
He may have just been crass in making the holiday statement, but I wasn't there so I can't say. That sucks though on the birthday; that is disheartening. I try to make Lodge educational and interesting, and at least with my officers I have an active interest. And everything we do we invite our new members to join in on; Lodge visitations, BBQs, etc. For my SW's birthday a bunch of us are going to his father's property for the weekend, and my SD and I both turn 30 this year so we're having a combined party.