grayflannelsuit
Premium Member
Brothers, I recently attended a pasta dinner at a lodge I am not a member of (but was considering joining after I am raised at my present lodge, but that is another story). I brought my young son with me but my wife was unable to attend. The WM knew who I was because I had visited once before (not during a communication), but beyond that I only had spoken to a few of the other brothers before.
Overall the experience was pleasant enough, and certainly every brother who helped my son and I with food and drink was quite courteous. I guess what stood out to me, however, was that not one of the brothers (aside from the WM when I showed up) once introduced themselves or made any attempt to find out who I was and gauge if I had any interest in Masonry or the lodge.
The reason this struck me as strange was that I thought that aside from being a fundraiser and community event, one of the other reasons for holding a pasta dinner was to meet and find out about potential new members. I'm not talking about straight up recruitment, mind you, as I know we don't do that. But I didn't even get so much as a "hey, never seen you around here before, my name's Bill." Again, everyone seemed very nice but I didn't see any effort being made to engage beyond the transactions involving the food.
I certainly wasn't expecting a bunch of people to swarm me and give me their life stories, but I don't know, it just was a little disappointing. I should also note that as far as turnout, there were not so many people there that you could say it was super busy and there was no time to do more than the basics.
Maybe part of the reaction I had was me, as I know I can be uncomfortable and even a little antisocial at times, but it just reminded me of every time I attended a church coffee social and everyone stayed at their tables talking to their own familiar groups while I sat staring at my coffee cup. I know I could've gotten up and started talking to people but that is definitely not a strong suit of mine and as a guest I'm not sure the onus should've been on me. But I will be honest and say that if I wasn't already a Mason and I was just some random guy from the public who was interested in Masonry but maybe was shy or awkward, I might not come back.
Anyway, I'm fully prepared to admit that I'm blowing this way out of proportion but I am curious to get some feedback from all of you. Was I expecting too much?
Overall the experience was pleasant enough, and certainly every brother who helped my son and I with food and drink was quite courteous. I guess what stood out to me, however, was that not one of the brothers (aside from the WM when I showed up) once introduced themselves or made any attempt to find out who I was and gauge if I had any interest in Masonry or the lodge.
The reason this struck me as strange was that I thought that aside from being a fundraiser and community event, one of the other reasons for holding a pasta dinner was to meet and find out about potential new members. I'm not talking about straight up recruitment, mind you, as I know we don't do that. But I didn't even get so much as a "hey, never seen you around here before, my name's Bill." Again, everyone seemed very nice but I didn't see any effort being made to engage beyond the transactions involving the food.
I certainly wasn't expecting a bunch of people to swarm me and give me their life stories, but I don't know, it just was a little disappointing. I should also note that as far as turnout, there were not so many people there that you could say it was super busy and there was no time to do more than the basics.
Maybe part of the reaction I had was me, as I know I can be uncomfortable and even a little antisocial at times, but it just reminded me of every time I attended a church coffee social and everyone stayed at their tables talking to their own familiar groups while I sat staring at my coffee cup. I know I could've gotten up and started talking to people but that is definitely not a strong suit of mine and as a guest I'm not sure the onus should've been on me. But I will be honest and say that if I wasn't already a Mason and I was just some random guy from the public who was interested in Masonry but maybe was shy or awkward, I might not come back.
Anyway, I'm fully prepared to admit that I'm blowing this way out of proportion but I am curious to get some feedback from all of you. Was I expecting too much?