About the Grand Orient de France. In short (and on top off my head). In the early days of FM when lodges of adoption, the GODF recognised them. This became a problem later on and the lodges of adoption were taken out of the organisation and the Grand Lodge Feminine de France was formed so that the GODF would not loose regularity.
This happened later on of course when they dropped the requirement to belief in 'something higher'.
Last, but finally within the scope of this thread, the GODF allowed their lodges to initiate women in 2010, but each lodge decides for itself if they do. In their own
communication about 2013/4 the GODF writes (Google translation):
1,319 women distributed
In 350 lodges. 757 were initiated at the GODF
And 562 joined him, from another Obedience.
As for other points mentioned in this thread. In the Netherlands there is usually an independent organisation taking care of the building which can be rented by both "regular" and other lodges. The management of that organisation may well contain both men and women. Also on open door days, both lodges may together receive guests (there is one building that houses the whole spectrum, "regular", mixed gender of two organisation, a women's lodge and a weavers lodge and their open door day they do together).
In the early days, "regular" Masons often helped out founding mixed gender lodges and they were member of both. This is no longer allowed, so when they help, it's usually on the background.