Opposing views on charity

Discussion in 'General Freemasonry Discussion' started by hanzosbm, Nov 25, 2015.

  1. hanzosbm

    hanzosbm Premium Member

    This question is a bit personal, but I wanted to get some other opinions.

    As Masons, we are taught to be charitable. We are also taught the limits to which our charity ought to extend having to do with our loved ones. But what happens when the wishes of your loved ones do not extend quite as far?
    Let's say that I came across someone (not a brother) who could use some help. I'm living paycheck to paycheck, but I've got a comfortable roof over my head, food on my plate, and am able to take the occasional vacation. In my mind, $50 is doable. Sure, it'd be nice to keep, but this person would benefit from it more. However, my fiancé doesn't feel the same way. To her, that $50 is belongs to us as we try to build a life and why should we be less comfortable for the sake of a stranger?

    The way I see it, I've got 3 choices (assuming that she's not going to change her mind, which is a fight that has not gone my way):

    1) Give it up, she's going to be my wife and these are decisions to be made together and which impact both of us.
    2) We aren't married yet, it's my money, I can do what I want and I'll deal with the fallout later.
    3) She doesn't see my bank account, do it, but don't tell her, even if it means hiding something from her.

    I'm conflicted between the duty I owe to her and to the duty I owe to my fellow man.
  2. Browncoat

    Browncoat Registered User

    None of us know your future-wife, or how your relationship operates. That's often a touchy subject that's best left alone. However, I'll just leave this here:

    Charity comes from the heart, not the pocket book.
    hanzosbm likes this.
  3. goomba

    goomba Neo-Antient Site Benefactor

    Injury to yourself could mean damaging an important relationship.

    Also maybe charity isn't charity. Maybe charity is something different than what charity is.
  4. hanzosbm

    hanzosbm Premium Member

    That is an excellent point, Goomba. Thank you.
  5. Bloke

    Bloke Premium Member

    Obligations to family before obligations to brothers... or strangers...

    (mind you, I am not always good at the above..)
  6. Warrior1256

    Warrior1256 Site Benefactor

    A delicate balancing act.

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