First of all, while it's expected that you continue in the line to become Master, it's not _required_ that you do so. You have a choice, and (assuming you have a regular, continuing line of officers) should you decide not to continue on and to drop back to the sidelines, talk things over with your current Master and Senior Warden about your concerns. Probably your Senior Deacon, too, since he's going to be affected as well.
As with joining the Craft, it's of your own free will and accord that you take on any of the chairs.
I can empathize... two orders of business after I turned in my Master's proficiency, I was brought west of the altar and installed as Junior Deacon, since the lodge had similar manpower shortages. I've continued in the line since then, and started my term as Sr. Warden in December. I got with the program,and decided to do the best job I could in each post. As Sr. Deacon, I went outside the lodge and earned my officer proficiency and even instructor certifications, busted my rear as junior warden, serving something like 40 banquet-type meals for from 30 to 130 members, and helping lecture & tutor new brothers at our own and at neighboring lodges. At this point, if I make it to next year, I will be the firs fellow to have sat sequentially in all five chairs in a long, long time, and I have a pretty good team of folks coming up behind me.
My faith got shaken pretty hard back in January when a couple of the old biddies on the Rainbow Advisory Board got all ruffled up about the fact the the other wardens and I had noted a typo in a program for one of the girls' installations, and sicced the PM and Master to come ream me out. Right about the same time, two of the past masters got riled at a practice session when I gently pointed out to them that their renditions of a part of the ritual were far, far away from the actual adopted work. I got yelled at for that as well. Lord, I thought, if something as petty as that gets them all riled up like that, well, I probably am not the right fellow to be sitting in the East next year. I stewed on it for a day or so, talked it over with the two guys in line behind me, as well as a couple of my mentors, and decided to stay in the line, but be low key for the time being to see how everything plays out. Next year's program is mostly in draft, and synced to our lodge's 5-year plan. So I'm fairly confident for this and next year, if we're allowed to carry things out.
Becoming Master isn't something that you should walk into bare-handed. I've done a lot of reading and study, watched other brothers in the position to try and pick up on both good ideas and bad (e.g., what seems to work well and what to avoid) by traveling out to a wide range of other lodges, studied and earned my proficiency and instructor certificates so as to be able to sit in and teach any chair, any degree, and worked hard to be a productive member in the lodge. I've only been in the Craft for a little more than 3 years myself, so you've still got time now to subdue your passions and improve yourself. I've found a couple of books that have really helped me, as well as picking up key lessons from my Royal Arch and Scottish Rite degrees.
As for the harassment from the other brethren, don't be thin-skinned. Our guys poke at each other in the same manner, usually in a joking way... but you do need to discern that foggy line between joking and bullying. The latter should never be allowed to happen in the lodge. We all made a promise to whisper good counsel when needed, and these sorts of incidents are when we should do so, before it gets to the point where charges would be justified.
Search your feelings... that little spark of leadership may still be within you. Find a good mentor (or two or three) and fan that flame.
Tom Ezell
Senior Warden, Adoniram #288