I never meant to start an argument between you guys.
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I don't see an argument at all.
One thing to know is that every jurisdiction is different, in how they dress, what officers the Lodge has, how they perform ritual, if they meet during July & August or not.
Some Grand Lodges let each lodge decide for themselves the appropriate dress code for lodge. Here in PA it is dictated by the Grand Lodge. Members and Visitors - suit & tie, Officers, Tails with a black vest and black tie (standard sartorial practice says this is no way to dress! lol). Elected Officers are a "Must" for this dress code, Appointed officers a "should" and can get by with a dark suit.
When we communicate with someone who shows an interest we invite them to dinner before a stated meeting, much like you were so invited. Whoever is in contact with them tells them when to show up and what to wear, and confirms they understand. The invitation is also communicated to our Secretary, who sends a letter with the same information. Recently we had someone inquire into membership via the Grand Lodge website system. He was invited via letter from the Secretary, clearly stating "dress is suit and tie." Our WM also contacted him by phone prior to the meeting and informed him "Dress is suit and tie." and also asked if he understood and if that was a hardship, to which he replied "No that is fine." He showed up wearing jeans, sneakers and a polo shirt. To us this showed lack of attention to detail, lack of respect for the requirements and / or an inability to follow instructions / guidelines. He did not make a favorable impression on the bretheren who met him at dinner.
So, the lodge should have let you know how to dress when they issued the invitation, you shouldn't have to ask, much less have to ask on an internet forum. In my opinion they are lax in their communication. I would ask someone you know in the lodge, or failing that one of the officers what appropriate dress is for their dinners.