Brothers,
I thank all of you for your advice. I will finish my MM in my current lodge, then search out a lodge where I can continue my education.
I chose my current lodge because of a promise I made to my wife. Her father was a member of the lodge, her mother was the WM in OES, and she belonged to Job's Daughters. She had fond memories of that lodge.
She passed away last year on my birthday, after a prolonged illness which left me no time to do anything but take care of her. This was known to the lodge after my initiation. Not one "brother" ever called to see how I was doing. Between my EA and FC I had a complete emotional meltdown-also known to the lodge. Again, not one person asked how I was doing. At this point I suspected that "brother" meant something different to them than it did to me.
I will not base my opinion on one lodge, you folks on this forum have shown me that not all Masons are the same-I thank you for that. My current lodge is half an hour away. There is a much larger lodge 5 minutes away. Perhaps what I am searching for was in my backyard all along. If not, that's what highways are for.
Some have suggested that I might try to reform my lodge, but I know I am not up to that task. That's like asking a soldier, fresh out of basic, to lead a company.
I miss my Army brothers, and I miss Texas.
Again, thank you.