Thank you and it seems like ive heard words that describe this person. One word ive heard and is the main word i use when speaking if this person is MANIPULATION. This is the main word that i can use to describe him.
He manipulates people to get info.
Cant believe that from my story that word was seen. Thats 100% on point.
Brother,
Because of my varied professions ( I wear 4 business hats), I have many opportunities to do business with Brothers; and I do just that --
Business.
I now have engagement letters that establish what is required and expected in any business arrangement. Very few Brothers dishonor me due to me:
1) being up front with what is expected to be engaged in and delivered from each of us; and
2) expecting them to do the same.
-- And doing all this IN WRITING!
When I am asked to participate in anything underhanded, no matter how slight, I say no deal and move on.
It's an interesting experience to have a Brother spell out in writing what they expect from me. Most will not spell out anything underhanded because they realize by writing it out, they are admitting that they are asking me to engage in something that is wrong
to some degree (yes, punned allusion intended!).
I have many great business deals with my Brothers and I shall continue to do the same as long as I am still working.
I've had a few dishonoring engagements that drove me to use an engagement letter for all opportunities. These dishonoring Brothers are still in debt to me for what I provided to them. The interesting thing is that these Brothers are so bogged down due to other accountabilities that they are trying to out run that they will likely go to their death never cleaning up the messes that they are making. The sad aspect is many of them have no clue that they are engaging in life dishonorably. They have no clue that the obligation about wronging, cheating and defrauding covers not only material (physical, legal, moral or ethical) things, but intellectual, emotional, and spiritual things as well.
Case in point, by asking you to engage as your Brother desires you to engage,
how would you be wronged, cheated or defrauded out of material (physical, legal, moral or ethical), intellectual, emotional, and spiritual values that you hold in high regard? As a business professional, I see quite a few things immediately and I hope that you do too.
I hope this question puts a different focus on your situation!
The engagement letters I currently have and employ have helped me minimize the influence of unethical and irresponsible Brothers and others on my life and I waste less time with these sorts than ever before. I whole heartedly recommend that you do the same into the future.
You have had a lot of lesson presented to you in this situation. They were lessons only though. If you wish to learn from them, your behavior must change in line with the lessons presented.
You could avoid doing business with your good Brothers. That behavior change might protect you from them but it won't protect you from the true problem that you caused by not have good business practices in place when it comes to working with anyone - known or unknown.
You can also do business with your good Brothers and others in a way that protects you and them from the situation at hand.
You know what you should do to assure good business into the future. Do it.